Updating Your Apple Pundit Vernacular for 2020

Posted by Matt Birchler
— 1 min read

We no longer say, “Macs are trucks and iPads are cars,” instead we say, “Macs a general purpose computers and iPads are consoles, did you actually think there were similar?”

We no longer say, “the iPad can replace your Mac,” instead we say, “the iPad is a totally different product with totally different distribution, and it will never be anything like a Mac.”

We no longer say, “there’s an app for that,” instead we say, “there’s an app for that as long as its business model fits in with the App Store rules written in 2008 and Apple gets 30% of whatever you're selling, even if you don't sell it in app, unless you're Netflix or some other big company.”

We no longer ask, “what’s a computer?” Instead we ask, “we all know what computers are, and iPads are no computers.”

We no longer say, “my Xbox One is a video game console,” instead we say, “there’s no reason a kid couldn’t go to college with their Xbox as their computer, you know a computer and a monitor and put the Xbox on their desk and have the Xbox run things like an email client and a good version of a web browser.”

Oh, and if we say something like “when I say iOS and iPadOS are consoles, I don’t mean video game consoles, but let me spend the next month comparing those to Xboxes and PlayStations.”


I feel like I got hit in the head and have woken up in some alternate reality.

I love Apple more than most people out there, but I’m finding it really hard to connect with the hardcore Apple fandom right now. It's like some of us talked ourselves into corner and instead of acknowledging it wasn't a good analogy we're digging in.

How is it I could vent about this a few short days ago and already have another bundle of things to vent about?